We all know how to have sex in order to conceive. If a couple is having trouble conceiving there are enough and more help out there to work on this problem. BabySpace in previous articles have written about where to start and where to find help in Sri Lanka in order to concieve. But, there is very little talk about having sex during a pregnancy. This could be due to the social stigma of our country but lesser and lesser women come out to talk about it.
So the BabySpace decided to break the ice! In this article we will be looking at several questions that several mothers-to-be we spoke to asked from us. If we fail to answer a question you have leave a comment or share an experience that will help other mothers-to-be.
Is sex during pregnancy really safe?
This could be a clichéd question but should not be disregarded. Yes, it is quite safe given that you are having a normal pregnancy proceeding without any complications. If you are not having health issues then you can have sex until your baby is born. But many would not have a ‘sexual appetite’ most often and probably will try to avoid it, which is perfectly fine too.
Lack of enthusiasm for sex is mostly caused by fatigue, morning sickness, hormonal fluctuations and back pain. If you feel that you don’t want to have sex talk to your partner and explain to him why you choose to avoid sex. This will help the two of you advance with a good understanding about each other.
So will sex during a pregnancy cause miscarriages or will it harm my baby? Miscarriages, unfortunately, is inevitable. However having sex will not cause any harm to your pregnancy. In fact having sex is quite healthy to both your partner and you. You may feel the contractions during orgasm a little more strongly and this is because when a woman is pregnant her uterus gets swollen and there is an increase in blood flow causing intensity in orgasms. Don’t worry about this affecting your unborn baby because it is well protected in amniotic fluid sap in the uterus and is enfolded by the muscles of the uterus.
When is having sex during pregnancy risky?
There are several instances where you should avoid sex and the most important is obviously, if your doctor have advised against it. The other reasons include:
- You bleed and the doctor has not advised it is normal
- You have experienced a premature birth
- You have experienced premature labour
- Your water broke
- Your placenta is covering the cervix- an opening of the uterus or a condition known as placenta previa
- You are in the last trimester of your pregnancy
- If you are having multiple fetuses
- You feel nauseas or extremely fatigued, experience cramps and there is blood following intercourse (in which case you can get help and advice from you doctor)
Also, if you are engaging in oral sex advice your partner not to blow into the vagina as it may cause a blockage of blood vessels due to air bubbles. This could be harmful to both the baby and the mother.
Best sex positions to adopt when you are pregnant
Spooning, where the male partner lies with the female partner in front, both facing the same direction. It is like a cuddle and also a very comfy way to have sex during a pregnancy. This is a very safe method because when spooning there is less or no pressure to the abdomen. It allows enough movement.
Sitting on a chair or bed
Let your partner sit on the chair or bed and sit on his lap facing away from him. This will aid to a smooth intercourse and keep the belly totally out of the way and you can be in control. Try this if you experience little cramps when you are having sex. If cramps persist, however, see your doctor.
At the edge of the bed
While lying at the edge or corner of the bed have your partner to kneel or stand on the floor. You can bend your knees and rest both feet of the bed or even lie of the bed. This way he will not put all his weight of you and will be less uncomfortable.
On hands and knees
We will advise you not to do this on your third trimester. By lying on the hands and knees while your partner penetrates from behind will help you both to enjoy the time.
Standing against the wall
This can be achieved by standing in front of a wall with legs spread and arms stretched to support yourself by resting your palms on the wall.
Of course, when you are in your early pregnancy period you can have sex in any position you wish to. But when you are over 15 weeks try to avoid positions where you have to lie directly on your belly or flat on your back because the uterus which has grown will exert pressure on your aorta. This will block the blood flow to the placenta. If you do have to lie on the back keep a soft pillow directly under you hip for support.
What will I feel after having sex during pregnancy?
Like we discussed before you will feel strong orgasms or contractions in your uterus. You will also feel intense fetal activity after the orgasms. Sometimes these feelings can proceed for half an hour at a time. At first this may worry you but rest assured this is perfectly normal and you’ll get used to it after some time.
Sometimes you may even experience a little blood, especially during your third trimester. This is normal too but if it does worry you consult your doctor for further advice.
Do not push yourself to have sex and feel sad if you do not have a sexual appetite during your pregnancy. Not all women get a sexual feeling at this time and once your baby is born you will have a normal sexual life as before. Always share your feelings with your partner. Remember that both of you are in this together.